so behind

I feel so guilty! I'm seriously behind on fibery work, but I've honestly spent the last couple of weeks in a heavy mixture of panic and nausea. It's so hard to get anything done when my stomach turns at the smell of wool- I hope this morning/all-day sickness goes away automagically at the end of the first trimester. I didn't anticipate all of these stomach problems- my mother never once experienced morning sickness, and we're built nearly identically.

My biggest worry is that at my first appointment and ultrasound, my doctor will discover that there isn't even a little bean in the cooker, and I'll really feel miserable/guilty/depressed/disappointed then. I guess if you haven't caught the hint that I'm slightly paranoid nonstop, you're probably getting the picture now. Fortunately, the internet hides a person's flaws fairly well. ;) Aaaand pregnancy exacerbates mental absurdities, as I'm discovering.

I'm going to be attending "1st prenatal appointments" with two different people- my regular OB, and a midwife who does homebirths and waterbirths. After they weigh my risks, I look forward to chosing the comfiest option (my fingers are crossed for the homebirth, though I'll be happy with a baby, no matter how it arrives!) I've always wanted to do a waterbirth too- and the midwife only charges an extra $30 for that, which is the cost of a new liner. When we did the math, the cost of birth under our insurance is nearly equal to the cost of birth at home, which insurance does not cover. I'm grateful to have options.

My apologies to those who are used to more regular Hobbledehoy updates! Since Trevor landed a nice lil job last month, I've felt at ease with taking some time off, but I'm really antsy to start carding more- especially since my job is my hobby and my favorite pasttime. Plus, I miss spinning! It's less nauseating than carding, so I might take a break next week to just spin up a pile of yarns.